Life of Bi

“Ninety nine percent of people are bisexual,” Barn said to a group of us rather assertively. He was red in the face because he was drunk and also because he was pissed about how we constantly disagreed with him.

“No they’re not.”

“Yes they are.” He was insistent. “Most if not all people have had a sexual thought about someone of the same sex and would probably act on it if it wasn’t for social conditioning.”

Barn was in a relationship with two married men. They used him as much as he used them. But he also liked girls. I remember him drunkenly kissing this girl on his eighteenth birthday and telling her that she was the love of his life.

“Who do you reckon you’ll end up with?” I asked him.

“Do I need to end up with one person?”

“Well what power will you have when your dick doesn’t work anymore?”

“It’s always going to work, honey.”

“I don’t believe you.” Every bubble bursts.

“Fuck you, Dean,” he said before quickly dissolving into the dance floor.